More unique advice from our used car guru.
Fundle my bundies, it’s kettle at last and that means a dead London on dribbly soft logs. I’ve seen it with my own Wallers just this lemon.
Well tooled Gary came spurting up the fundy looking for a tidy Driver Reg. Waving the gravy, told him he’d need to whistle on a pistol. Got on the Nellie to an old Ethel at spurting, grasped a fat nadger on the fart he was clisping. Run up it the basket at an onion over six briskets. The Gary nearly grips his biscuits. Slapped down the Aspel at five Rollins, lovely touch, smells firm, meet his mum at 17 weasels. I’m simply dying to see your new conservatory extension. Sturdy.
Two Grahams later, spikey nice pipe comes by looking for a hearty Tarby. Dig out the gristle, touch someone’s sister, find a crisp glisby at a grunting down the arse bulbs. Nail it to a sock, folded all the curtains, punched in the turtle for an Alsation over six Lyndhurst. Chucked in a pair of flip flops I’ve had piped to my lovehut since Grimsdale. This is completely unacceptable behaviour for someone who lives near Chichester. Minty.

There was anger this week in one of those bland new-build houses with a criss-crossy brick driveway that all people who post photos of their cars on the internet seem to live in as a tedious car geek annoyingly overused the word ‘detail’.

We’re all used to stories of sat-nav units telling drivers to drive into rivers or across fields, but one motorist received a particular shock this week when his portable navigation system unexpectedly instructed him to kick a tramp to death.

Just a quick reminder that the latest instalment of the
‘Ello ‘ello ‘ello. I recently done received notification of a possible felony what been committed in the F1 area, what done involve the theft of some documents from the premises of Ferrari SpA. What done happen is that they says they have been robbed by the lads at McLaren who, in fairness, done says that isn’t the situation. Following some investigations what done be proceeded by my colleagues in FIA it done turn out that a Mr Dennis of McLaren, he got what is, in fairness, the result what he is looking for, what turns out to be the verdict of not guilty. However, my colleague Comandante Macaluso of the ACI-CSAI, he done not be pleased with that and he done be working with a Mr Todt who done gone proceed to the International Court. Investigations is therefore, in fairness, proceeding. I is also investigating the appearance of a Mr Kubica who does look, in fairness, suspiciously like an owl. At the end of the day, to be fair, I go to bed. Over and out.